My Life is a Lie
by EpicKoopalings
Summary: Bowser has just informed his first seven kids that he's not really their father. This is the aftermath as the Koopalings try to adjust to this news.


**As some die-hard Mario fans (such as myself) already know, in a recent interview at the end of a GameInformer magazine, Shigeru Miyamoto (the creator of Mario) revealed that the first seven Koopalings from Super Mario Bros. 3 aren't really Bowser's kids. This is my interpretation of what would happen if this news was as sudden in the Mario World as it was in the Real World.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Mario or anything Mario-related except for this story.**

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Ludwig von Koopa's black pupils furrowed under his bushy blue eyebrows as he concentrated on his work. He was in the middle of writing one of his Koopa symphonies that were famous throughout all of Dark Land.

But Ludwig was only doing this as a failed attempt to get his mind off the horrible news his father had announced that morning in front of the whole Koopa family:

"_Children, I have good news and bad news for you. The good news is Junior is officially heir to the throne."_

"_YEAH! Thanks, Papa!"_

"_WHAT?!" Ludwig protested. "I know he's your favorite and everything, but I'm your eldest child; ergo, I should be the heir!"_

"_About that, Ludwig, that's the bad news. You see…you, Lemmy, Roy, Iggy, Wendy, Morton, and Larry," the king began, gesturing to each Koopaling as he spoke. "You seven…are actually _not_ my kids."_

As much as Ludwig prayed to the Ztars that this was all some sort of sick joke, it was true. He and his first six siblings weren't Bowser's children after all. The Koopa King had simply come across them (he had kept mum on specific details) and raised them to be sneaky, two-faced cheating illiterates just like he was. Oh, and lying. Can't forget that excellent trait. After the news, Bowser had asked his right-hand Magikoopa Kamek to update the Koopalings' profiles in the official Koopa Troop records. They would still be called the Koopalings, but now instead of being Bowser's children, they'd simply be high-ranking henchmen, right up there with Boom Boom and Pom Pom.

_When I woke up this morning I was the heir to the Koopa throne. Now I'm no better than that fist-swinging Neanderthal._ Ludwig was taking it hard. As the oldest, he had believed the lie for the longest. Although now that he thought about it, it did explain why none of the Koopalings except for Junior (Bowser's only _real_ child) resembled _the king_ in the slightest.

The ocean blue-shelled Koopaling sighed and looked down from his desk. Scattered across the floor were blueprints back from the days when Ludwig had been referred to by the nickname "Kooky" and his advanced brain was set on being an inventor, before he had realized his true calling that is.

Back from the days when he called Bowser Koopa "King Dad".

The Koopa sighed. He had dug those old things up for sentimental reasons. His eyes gazed across the ridiculous designs with equally-ridiculous names, including the "Lame Brainer", the "Koopa Klogger", the "Koopa Doopa Raiser-Upper", and the 'Koopa-Color-Goopa". Even now Ludwig wasn't quite sure what he was thinking when he named that last one.

The whole time Ludwig had mentally slapped himself. He was the meanest, cruelest, and nastiest of all the Koopalings. He shouldn't be moping over these inferior inventions like a Sad Goomba. But at the same time, he felt that he needed to do it.

Ludwig closed his eyes and sighed again. He began thinking about…well, everything. After a few minutes, he opened his eyes. Without another word, he used his fire breath (one of the few actual similarities between himself and Bowser) to burn the old blueprints to ashes. Ludwig had come to the conclusion that _that_ part of his life was long since over, and it was time to move on to his new life. He may no longer be Bowser's _son_, but he'd be one Underwhere of a minion!

Right after he finished his symphony.

But as the blue-backed Koopa organized those notes and clefts into yet another masterpiece, his beloved brain couldn't help but process one thought:

_My life is a lie._

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**Review please.**


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